See No Evil

See No Evil (2006): Yes folks, it’s another dead teen movie and this one stars that famous wrassler ‘Cain’ as the evil teen remover. The group of Cain fodder is composed of juvenile delinquents on a work release program to help clean up an old hotel. Now do you think they would release both male and female miscreants on the same trip and on the same bus to stay overnight at the same hotel!!! Well, at least that gets the boys and gals in a position to try and do a little camel dancing overnight and gives Cain a good excuse to eliminate most of them. Cain is one ‘BAMF’ (non-good derriere female parental unit aardvarker), big as a house, and uses giant ‘fish’ hooks to catch unruly teens.

It seems Cain was abused by his dear old mum who was a bit of a stickler on living a clean life and apparently locked the young wrassler in a dog cage naked until he learned scriptures or at least stopped thinking about girls. This appears to have had a somewhat negative effect on Cain’s social skills and on his vocabulary which appears to run from ‘ah’ to ‘gurr’ and ‘ugh’. With dialogue like that, Cain is unlikely to be playing Hamlet anytime soon. However, to be fair to the movie, it does attempt to explain why Cain is like he is and how he turned up at the hotel in time to eliminate the teens and their escorting guards. In a rare show of continuity, in an early flash back, Cain is shown getting shot in the head and appearing to be headed for a dirt nap. Later in the movie, he is shown with a bullet hole in his head and true to the gore level of this little blood bath, the hole is crawling with maggots, a nice touch which might also help explain his anti-social behavior. I mean, how friendly would you be with maggots eating your brain.

If you like lots of gore and blood in your movies, this may be of interest. If logic and reality is your cup of tea, pass on this one. The movie is rated R for: hooking through the jaw, multiple teen hookees, gratuitous shower scene, rising to the next floor without aid of elevator or stairs, raising Cain, dropping Cain, and especially for the way dear old mum stuck to the wall while becoming a ‘departed’.